Birthdate: 5/20/32

Birthplace: Phoenix, AZ)

Raised: Hell. Spent a bazillion weekends in Venice and Santa Monica as a youth. I'd drive out with just enough money to drive back to Pheonix, and often slept in the car near the beach.

Highschool graduated from: Dear Valley... had I stuck with it. (Screw that!)

Car you drive: '69 Bug (I mainly bought it 'cause it's from '69). It sucks!

Favorite book: The Stand (long version), Stephen King

Favorite television program: "Monty Python's Flying Circus" -- though it's starting to date pretty bad.

Favorite movie: Pink Flamingos

Blood type: I run on oil

Shoe size: 13 (no joke. Everyone says "you're kidding," and then they insinuate naughty things. It's hurtful, terrible fun.)

Favorite cartoon: Honestly, The Simpsons, but I dig an old x-rated cartoon called "Fritz the Cat," just because it was so dumb.

Celebrity you secretly dress up as: Faye Dunaway. Please remember, this is comedy.

If you were a dog, what breed would you be?: Black Lab!!!!!!!!!

Worst job you've ever held: Baggin' groceries. Held it 3 days when I was 16, and decided I'd better find a job I liked, or it was onto welfare!

Psychological diagnosis of yourself: Only human on Earth who is 100% sane and healthy.